I’ve written a lot lately about relationships and the ins and outs of dating as a whole. This time around, I’m focusing on the single ladies and fellas. These next few weeks are trying times for us single folks. I’m here to help you navigate (and lets be honest, cope) with your lack of a significant other this holiday season.
This is the easier of the two major holidays to be single. If anything, you’re in the clear because you don’t have to introduce yet another girl or guy to your family. If your family is anything like mine, being single at Christmas is a godsend. The only issue is, if you’ve been single as long as I have. Your family begins to ask questions and worst case scenario, they begin to worry. My family hasn’t met a girl in six years. I’m hounded every time I show up to a family dinner alone. Nonetheless, I’ll feel better when I see how uncomfortable some other family member is bringing their significant other around for the first time.
I’d be remiss in telling you that I’m not a little sad that I can’t even mention a girl I’m seeing at Christmas dinner. Even if your significant other isn’t ready for the entire family, be sure to mention someone you’re seeing. That’ll at least get your overzealous aunt off your back. Whatever your situation, single or not-so-single. At the end of the day, you’ll be happy that you aren’t walking on pins and needles around your family hoping they don’t mention the time you brought home a dead bird or something. Not that that has ever happened to me or anything…
Ah, the most depressing holiday for the single person. Being single when that clock hits midnight is probably the most you’re going to feel like loser in the proceeding 365 days combined. Something about not having someone when the year starts is like starting the week with a negative bank account balance. New Years Eve is the arguably the best dressed day of the year and it feels all for naught when going out alone. The most you can hope for is a group of friends you really enjoy to go out and have a debaucherous night out with. If you’re a girl, this is easy. Single girls stick together better than Canadian Geese traveling north and south. Guys, hate to say it but…you’re going to be searching a bit for a group.
The real, most depressing moment for a single person during New Years is that dreaded time, not midnight, no. It’s 11:55 when everyone pairs up like they’re about to board Noah’s ark. It’s that time. Time for the New Years kiss. Now this isn’t all sad. Im here to help, it’s what I do as the Outlet Networks resident millennial dating expert. I have the strategy for getting that New Years kiss so you if you DO go home alone come nights end. You don’t go home feeling like you just got swept in the World Series. I call it the New Years Grind and Find. You have to break away from your group. Share your location on your phone with your friends for 24 hours, you don’t wanna be the “wanderer” in your group. Next, turn on the “fun” in your personality. Imagine that you organized this entire party and you’re trying to make sure everyone has a good time. Guy or girl, every single person is going to gravitate towards the most fun guy or girl in the room. Then, dance like you’re Chris Brown on the 2008 “Exclusive” tour, even if you can’t. By this time of night, no one will care. A guy or girl will inevitably find you. Dance with them until that dreaded 5 minute period of coupling up. That’s it! You have a NYE kiss. Can you tell I’ve done this a time or two!?
Well, I hope this blog helped you cope with your family, the holidays, and your Seasonal Affective Disorder just a little bit better. Stay tuned to this site and follow me on all socials @RotelBeckhamJr for more advice and bad takes.